Fun for the whole Family

An interesting dream last night. One of my ex-girlfriends (which one I don’t know, the dream didn’t reveal it) turned out to be related to one ofthe Sopranos, but it was like the Sopranos set in Melbourne. The cops were closing in fast on her, and she’d decided to skip the country, to move to New York and start up life there, to avoid them. For some reason I was not only helping her in a bit of very rapid packing, but I was seriously considering going with her. Hmm.

Then my mother turned up with dozens of kids’ shoes. Why, I don’t know, but it reminded me that there’s no way I want to go and live anywhere without my kids. So I decided I’d just drive mystery woman to the airport, though I was worrying if I might therefore be implicated in any police investigation into her disappearance.

The real world then intruded, though indirectly. I usually turn off my mobile phone at night, to save a few hours on the battery, and because I am loathe to interrupt my sleep for a phone call. This week this has been somewhat re-inforced by my starting to read "Blast From The Past", which revolves around a latenight phone call. But last night I forgot to turn off my mobile.

And it rang. At 4:54am – and 41 seconds. I didn’t hear it, though it would have got reasonably loud. It’s not one of those godawful jingles like some people have, and not one of those wanky polyphonic rings. (No doubt in a year or three they’ll be the norm, but right now they sound like the owner is showing off what an expensive shiny new phone they have.) No, mine’s just a fairly standard ring, which starts off quiet and gets steadily noisier, then by about the fifth ring, stops and diverts the caller to voicemail.

It didn’t wake me. I think it did, however, nudge my kids just slightly out of the land of Nod. Perhaps just across the border from Nod, to some Tijuana-like resort town. They were sleeping a room and a closed door away from the phone, and I remember being awake, hearing them coughing (they have colds at the moment), and glancing at my clock and noticing it was just after 5am.

So, who rang? I don’t know. The bastards didn’t leave a message on the voicemail, and as for the phone, well it helpfully recorded the time of the call to the nearest second, but as for the identity of the caller simply recorded "(no number)". Very bloody helpful.

By Daniel Bowen

Transport blogger / campaigner and spokesperson for the Public Transport Users Association / professional geek.
Bunurong land, Melbourne, Australia.
Opinions on this blog are all mine.